Like you, I’ve written so many first lines for my novels, I could add them up and the page count would be the same as the novel itself.
They, editors, agents, writing experts say:
Make it more engaging.
Don’t start with dialogue.
So, let’s say, we finally think our first line of the entire novel kicks butt. We breathe. All good, right?
Yeah, but…
Let’s say the endings of your chapters follow “the rules” and beg the reader to continue on. In other words, we’ve got them hooked.
Here’s another point. Let’s say our readers close the book at the end of chapter ten, and it’s a couple of days before they can get back to the story. Will they remember what’s going on when they open to page eleven or will they have to flip back some pages to be reminded?
That in itself is not terribly important. However …
Are your beginning sentences in other chapters as good at the first? Are they close? Ponder and consider. I think beginning sentences in all chapters are important. Think of the reader in a book store trying to decide what book to buy. They randomly flip to the beginning of chapter three and find something like, “She got dressed and left her apartment.” Boring.
[Related: Want a second pair of eyes? Check out our proofreading service.]
When I checked my WIP I was happy with the ending sentences in my chapters. I had paid more attention to them.
But when I checked beginning sentences of other chapters?
So I made some changes.
Old: “We eat a quiet supper in the Hutchings’ kitchen.”
Revised (for the moment):“Mama had made vegetable soup and cornbread, but we eat slow, like its been over salted. Nobody talks.”
Old: “The surging creek pulls the brute, and my best friend, downstream.”
Revised (for the moment): Four arms flail in the rushing water, their heads bobbing up and down as they disappear downstream. “No, no!” I cry. “Frank!”
As authors, we want to make every sentence perfect. Unless my novel is only two pages long, I won’t ever be able to manage that task.
Still, we struggle for improvement and do the best we can.
Let’s be flawless in our imperfections!
Happy writing!
This guest post was contributed by Carolyn Dennis-Willingham. Carolyn is the author of two published books – No Hill for a Stepper, 2001, and The Last Bordello, 2016. Her third novel, The Moonshine Thicket, is set in 1928 and is currently enduring a professional edit. When not writing, she fitness boxes, hangs out with children and grandchildren or throws a tennis ball for her ever-persistent mini Aussie. In addition to her blogging website, you may find her on Facebook and Twitter. Alternately titled “Your First Sentence in Every Chapter.”
Reblogged this on All About Writing and more.
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Old: Lieutenant Jor Parker held a small tool in one hand and an eye guard to shield her vision in her other.
Revised: The hiss and smoke at the juncture of a heated metal rod touching down on the green control board made Lieutenant Jor Parker squint through her eye shield.
Old: Jor, or as she was known on her homeworld of Alteria, Khadia-ett Jor Maris Parker, royal first niece to the childless crowned Royal Prince of Alteria, her Uncle Zacharias Meltonsi Bryan Belmonts, and first daughter to his only sister Khadia Jodel Salisia Parker, entered her lower-level engineering lab in the basement of the aging ship the Icarus.
Revised: Being the first niece to the childless Prince of Alteria, her uncle Zacharias, and with her mother functioning as Khadia, the ambassador representative for the entire planet, made her a princess and Khadia-ett, titles she neither wanted nor needed as she entered the bowels of the engineering lab on the lowest level of the aging ship Icarus.
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I love this. Great idea. I really need to do this with my WIP.
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Reblogged this on The Reluctant Poet.
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This is so true. I used to struggle to continue writing my next chapter because I will be going back to edit and re-edit what I had already written!
“Let’s be flawless with our imperfections!”
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Reblogged this on Kim's Musings.
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Thank you for this post! I’ve seen a lot of conflicting advice about how to properly word the first sentence, but never the last sentence, and this has shown that both have equal importance. I also appreciate the specific advice for how to word these sentences. Thanks again!
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Reblogged this on Foster Your Writing and commented:
If you’re wanting to improve the first line of your book, or the last, check out this post by Carolyn Dennis-Willingham on A Writer’s Path!
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